Being too much of a SqUaRe?

So I am pretty aware that I live a crazy lifestyle, and totally rock purple pants because that is the only way to live on the edge, but I just found this on the internet, and it made me feel like a complete square.  Apparently, my dad has to own American Apparel  before I can be legit.

Click me, I get feisty!

As a Mexican this is a must! topic

I know I am only feeding the mass hysteria about the Swine Flu (H1N1), but can we pronounce conspiracy? For many days after this epidemic came to be, I could not figure out why people were going crazy about the flu causing some deaths. I know that sounds bad but over 30,000 people in the US of A pass away from influenza a year, and our dear pig friends in no way have reached those numbers, why isn't the regular flu ever a 4 on its way up the pandemic scale? All I could think about was a political agenda keeping people from traveling to Mexico because of the drug cartels, which is totally happening FYI. In my opinion, don't make a big deal about the newest strain of the flu sickness, which is empowering the Medical Industrial Complex, and just tell people that the cartels will take more lives than this flu will. By the way, the H1N1 looks like this--------------------------------------->

Oh wait, that is actually a pandemic that has killed millions of people that is called the HIV-1 virus. So if you are having hot passionate love, you should definitely use the condom that you totally have. I know the actual virus looks pretty with its tulip envelope but it's a very scary thing, anyway, latex is totally sexy.

UPDATE:

My supervisor and I at work thought of all the ways the Swine Flu is all a gimmick but I have recently changed my mind.  Today I discovered that her youngest has been sick and feverish for a few days, and her second son in command had to be pulled out of school today and hurled in the car, swine flu DC? SO, due to recent discoveries I felt it necessary to provide you with some precautions and tips:

1. Using those face masks that you saw crazy people wearing weeks ago, totally in fashion now.
2. Use organic, animal free hand & body soap, apparently most other products have swine fat and that is just not okay.
3. Stop eating meat: Why are you eating pork anyway? Don't you know who Babe, Miss Piggy, Porky Pig, Piglet, Pumbaa, and The Three Little Pigs are?
   
4. It has been discovered that tea time with your piggy friend builds warmth in your heart which in turn produces anti-bodies against H1N1. Crumpets anyone?

pronounce |prəˈnouns|

It is only totally legit that I repeat, verbatim, the definition of this word, you know for shits and massive giggles:

verb [ trans. ]1 make the sound of (a word or part of a word), typically in the correct or a particular way : Gerry pronounced the hero's name “Cahoolin” | a refugee whose name no one could pronounce.2 declare or announce, typically formally or solemnly : allow history to pronounce the verdict | [with complement ] she was pronounced dead at the scene | [with clause ] the doctors pronounced that he would never improve.• [ intrans. ] ( pronounce on) pass judgment or make a decision on :the secretary of state will shortly pronounce on alternative measures.

Usually I am not the biggest fan of dictionary examples, so I did you the favor of striking out the unnecessary jargon, you can thank me by sending me some money on PayPal.

I am not sure why I am following Blogger protocol by telling you the reason behind the birth of this blog, but the social Blogger pressure is too much to handle and I can't afford bad karma.  The creator and mastermind of this devious vice is Satira. She only started her blog to prove that she had "like totally hella gay friends," a Kathy Griffin wannabe, and to lie about her connections with Ralph Nader. No, but seriously, check her out, just keep your mom away.

Come back for some more deep posts, reading along will be like falling down the rabbit hole, just don't expect treats that you can swallow.  I'll leave it to you to swallow whatever your heart desires.